I shouldn't be bothered about that but.....

the truth is that I really am now.

I'm disturbed,

I'm confused,

I feel useless and hopeless!!!

what's even worst is that I hell-ed my SPM.

and now this again??!!!

are you kidding me??!!

It is never easy if you were to be in my shoe...

believe me.

conclusion about life:

- work hard to the core to be a leader and manipulate others

-there is only two groups of ppl in this world; the losers and the winners

-you slow, you'll lose

-you soft-hearted, you'll lose

-you shared too much, you'll lose

-you trusted your friends too much, you'll lose

-you relaxed, you'll lose

If you lose, the society will laugh for your failure.

So dont be one of those, but rather be the one that laugh others...

These philosophy are not all from me. But a combination from dad and Mr. Pushpanathan and myself. I truly believe in them and will always bare that in mind and hold on to them.

Life was never easy~

cant believe I'm going to china in 5 more days but I havent even pack anything yet. Not even a 'tai fu'. Speaking of 'tai fu', I wish I could go out and buy those disposable ones. easy and save energy because I dont need to carry any extra pounds of 'tai fu' in my luggage...

3 subjects to go in 12 days

The whole period of SPM is like a horror movie for me,

So this piece of horror movie in my life started with the most 'sialan' BM paper. Omgosh~~

As a normal human being, eveyone, doesnt matter what test or exam it is, expects the first day is gonna be just fine. But this BM spoilt my first day and almost the following day...

Anyhow, I have gone through 8 subjects out of 11 subjects that I take in SPM, and I always say I dont care anymore about those 'limpas sudah punya', but the truth is, I still dreamt of them just last night(It's neither a sweet dream nor a beautiful nightmare, trust me). Meaning, I am still so worried about them to the max.

Oh yea, I'm happily declared that I have also gone through the Bible Knowledge paper. Yup, I can say that I'm proud of myself because I'm the second one in my family after my dad that took this subject. Not even sis and bro dare to take this. So no matter what I'll get in SPM for this one, I am still proud of it because BK IS SO NOT EASYx100000. Well, at least for me, a not very smart girl.... hmm........

I have to admit that I'm not a smart girl neither a hardworking weirdo(yup, I'm anti-bookworm. no ba, I'm just jealous ba). So dont kasi malu me ah when I got my result. heheh

Note the 12 days to go at the title? uhum, and right after that, the next day I''ll begin my journey with my parents and relatives to Hunan, Changsha, ZhangJiaJie, Shenzhen and bla bla for 8 days and then baru The Sims 3 back at Tanjung Aru here. I cant wait to play that and I cant wait more to wear winter clothing. Yes!!!!! and dont worry Dio, my research had shown that mom and dad are 100% not going to jual me there because with all these lemak under my phospholipid bilayer, not much people would want to buy me. In another words, tidak laku la...

Despite the stress that I'm facing now, I'm still grateful and will always be because I'm blessed with 2 lovely nephews. 2 in a year lagi tu, nda kau...

The busy nenek!!

And going to 'gai-gai' will always be their all time favourite

SPM is exactly a week away

Dying softly day after day...

And guess what, my most fear subject goes to BIBLE KNOWLEDGE!!!!!!!!!!

Oh God please help me...

Bible K is not really that hard but only one thing, u need to memorise exactly every word from the Gospel according to St. Luke and the Act of Apostles.

That is why u need to literally 'telan' the whole text(24 chapters for St. Like+28 chapters for Acts)...

As a conclusion, pray hard and telan all the Ginko pills!!

Almost everyday ppl give us advice on everything for our own good. Sometimes, they're in the form of critics, and sometimes is quite a friendly and so on, even those funny ones...

So, today, Miss Tham who is also my ex-classmate's aunt back in KK High School, our English in Science and Technology Teacher, happened to gave us an advice that is quite unforgettable and 'eye-widenning' that is:

'Don't just because of the word I love you from a guy, you take off your panty'

&

'If you want to have sex, make sure that it is really safe'

:o

omgosh~~

One of the things that you wont get if you're in a co-ed school is these kind of advices from ur teacher. Actually, we kinda terpesong a bit during class because this advice really has nothing to do with the EST subject, like so obviously. You know, I wonder what kind of advice that she will give to Foo K Yung, her nephew since she is a very open-minded type of person!!??

14 days to go, matimatimatimati!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And tomorrow will be our graduation ceremony, yayy.........

20 days to SPM

Well, felt like hell this morning when I realised that all I've done turned out to be just a total waste. 20 days before SPM and I got such a shitty result for my add maths. It's really bloodyful stupid and I almost cry when I got the result just now. I'm not satisfied with that and I felt like the whole world is against me until teacher Saripah a.k.a cikgu Sula Pepe told us about her ex-schoolmate long time ago whom has become crazy because he did not get what he want for his SPM. Then I started to realised that all of the anxiety that I'm facing wont bring me any good. So at last I'm cooling myself down and learn to take one step at a time.

'Rome was not built in one day'

peace out ya'll

And suddenly I felt like non of the things that I really want matters anymore. Face it, I'm not a genius. So what for I want to compete with those geniuses. Live life and love. That's what matters now.

When was the last time that u 100% pay attention during mass?

Erm... I dont really know when actually. Maybe my time havent come yet... U'll know what I meant when u read below

This very morning when I went to church:
-sat selekeh-ley at the 'bench'(what's that call?)
-suddenly a man macam came and sat beside.
-my first impression was "is that man a 'tai ngi long'(ahli kongsi gelap)? brought along a bible lagi tu.."
-then the mass started with the openning hymm and I was like "wah this man can karaoke liao, so loud"
-the priest then bla bla and then came this thought again, "this man said Amen very loud pula"
-during the homily, "never thought that a man like this would come to church, if with family oklah but this one alone lagi tu"

.........

God please forgive me

Oh one more thing,

'We Were The Mulvaneys',

I watched this movie in Hallmark last Saturday and I cried... Seriously.

There's a lot of value like believe in God always, be patient, love your family no matter what, you will find ur other half one day, be sederhana and so much more that you will gain when u watch this,

so do watch this ok.

U beli the disc kah, download kah, u have to watch this especially if u're a family type of person.

Very touching la, I hold my tears like the whole time and eventually I cried at almost the end of the movie because of __u watch it urself___.

After I watched this movie, I realised that I have been a dull brat at home. I seldom smile, laugh,... I kinda regretted for being everything that I usually am at home.

But I know that it's never too late.

Life is boring without challanges, isn't it?
so face it, SPM is boring without Additional Mathematics hahah

yeah rite~

Rain extravagant

everytime when the clock rings on weekdays, how malas-ley I force myself to wake up. If it happens to rain at that time, I will always take an extra 5 mins to wake up. But when it is the type of train that literally 'splashing' down like wild horse with the crazy wind like they want to suck u, I need an extra 10 mins to wake up because I kinda hide under my bed as it is so bloody cold.

Anyway, yesterday a rain extravagant literally hit KK and maybe the whole Sabah, and everything was so disaster... First thing when I got out from mom's car, I got 70%wet. Then along the pathway to reach my class flooded like a pond. But since my shoes are wet already and I dont even bother to take the long way, so I just walk through the water taking my sweet time because I dont want to fall down. When I reached my class, my shoes were the one that flooded with rain water.

However, I hardly sigh because it's kinda fun anyway and moreover, this is nothing if u would compare it with the Philipines. The rain that hit us was just the tampias of theirs only. So be greatful people. It's always better to get water than fire except for Tsunami, duh~~

Just when I 'think' I got a bit of time for myself to malas-malas on my bed day dreaming and bergolek-golek because our 1st trial exam just passed, our 2nd and also the last trial will be on next week, shiatt!!

Then, my result for the 1st trial exam was not really what I have expected especially for Chemistry and add maths... When I was doing the questions during the exam, I felt that they're quite easy but stupidly boohoo for me that I just got 50 plus for both of the subjects. Isshh, it really breaks ur heart when the subject that u really like turn out to be below 55%... It's really stupid!!! and I felt stupid too!!!

Spm is just 47 days to go and all I can say is that this is it, this is the final countdown!! I hope all the efforts that I've put is gonna be worth it. Moreover, I've gain 5 kg since the month of June and that is disgusting, I felt like my body had added 5kg of gelatin that keeps on 'bounching'...